What to do when you are sitting in a hospital room by yourself… Well my solution is writing. I’ve obviously had a lot of time to think about life, it’s meaning, and the reasoning behind the things life seems to throw our way. My conclusion is this… Life is life, and God is God. He is much greater than anything we must endure, and we need only to lean on him. I have come to the realization that everything is going to be ok and I have nothing to fear. My blood will get figured out, the finances to cover the expenses will flow in, and moving to Michigan will work out as well. God is God and He is taking care of everything for us, even if we can’t see it happening.
I’m thinking more and more about that Bible verse he showed me through my doctor randomly this morning… Isaiah 41:10 “So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” I am discovering that His strength is all I need. I was reading “Confident Heart” by Renee Swoope earlier and came across the realization that when I start to doubt or fear, I am taking my focus off the strength giver, and putting my focus on my own strength which, we clearly all know, I don’t have. Letting go of control is another one of my major struggles, and it’s something I’m constantly trying to give to God. I’m starting to feel like God allowed this mess to happen to slow me down, so I could take my focus off of the unnecessary and apply it to the necessary.